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Friday 26 February 2016

2/26: How Two Llamas And A Dress Gave Us The Internet's Greatest Day

February 26, 2015, was hardly one minute old when the day’s first big news broke. At 12:01 a.m., Washington, D.C., Mayor Muriel Bowser allowed the city’s marijuana legalization law to take effect. Plenty more news would follow. As the East Coast braved its morning commute, the Palm Beach Post reported news of a man who checked into a local hospital complaining of a headache, before doctors found a bullet lodged in his head. The New York Times reported news of “3 Brooklyn Men Accused of Plot to Aid ISIS’ Fight.” British intelligence officials identified the notorious ISIS executioner Jihadi John.

A paper in Nature discovered evidence of a “Supermassive Black Hole Dating to Cosmic Dawn.” The Federal Communications Commission was scheduled to vote on net neutrality, prompting the editors of Tech Policy Daily to ask, “Will February 26, 2015 Mark the Death of Internet Freedom?” And late-evening reports that billionaire Donald J. Trump was “more serious than ever about pursuing a run for the White House in 2016” began to meander across cable news chyrons.

It was also the day that two cheeky llamas broke loose from an Arizona retirement home, bringing the world’s screen-gazers together in glee, just hours before an optical illusion in the form of a sensibly priced evening dress tore us all apart.

Outrageous, controversial, and frivolous things catch fire online all the time, but February 26 was different. The Great Llama Escape and The Dress besieged our timelines just hours apart, almost as if connected, in some unknown way. On an internet that can feel increasingly toxic, these two back-to-back news events were nearly impossible to politicize. They were silly and fleeting — but, a year later, they’re still lodged in our collective cultural memory.

They were divisive, sure, but in the kind of low-stakes way that affirms, rather than threatens, our shared humanity. And they were purely joyful and universal in the way that the best things on the internet can feel. Simply put: We lost our shit, and we lost it together twice in the same day. And we had fun doing it. And we haven't seen anything like it since.

This is the story of that day.

“Nothing touched the world like two llamas in Sun City.”

Around 12 p.m. ET, Karen Freund and Bub Bullis, two longtime llama owners from Sun City, Arizona, take three llamas — Kahkneeta (tall, white), Laney (shorter, black), and Alejandro — to a retirement home for a late-morning meet-and-greet event.

Karen Freund, llama owner: Richard Falkenberg is a friend who we’ve known for the last 10 years, since we got into llamas. We became good friends, caravanning to all the llama shows. Eventually Falkenberg retired and sold his house and llamas and he moved into his retirement home. He wanted to do this therapy thing for his retirement home community thing, and so he asked us, "Would you bring them over?" I had a friend come because Richard wanted the three llamas.

Stephanie Schmidt, ‎director of sales at The Carillons Retirement Community: The old director of our place didn’t want to have llamas visit, but we pushed and pushed and we brought the llamas.

Llamas at the Carillons Retirement Community

Freund: We get there and it’s great. We walked the llamas into the community room and they meet and greet with people. We want everyone to get to pet the llamas, so we parade them around out there and everything is great.

The llamas finish the scheduled part of their visit around 1 p.m. ET.

Schmidt: All the residents pet them and posed with them, and some residents who were sick were visited by the llamas in their apartments. It was a very nice day. The next thing you know they're loading them up to leave and one of the llamas gets spooked. It spooked the other. Pretty soon the two llamas, Kahkneeta and…god, what’s the other’s name? They were loose, having fun, a good ol' time, trotting and being free. But then, just like that, it stopped being fun.

Freund: Near the end, a couple of Richard's friends wanted to see the llamas. So the llamas are handed off to Richard. And, well, Richard is getting older, and he's not quite holding the rope right...he has this cowboy hat on and he's messing around with this bag that he has and not holding the rope as well as he should. And I don't know what spooked her, but something did, and Richard got knocked off balance. I’m freaking out, thinking he's gonna break a hip, and poor Richard — he's still holding on to the rope with his cowboy hat, and this just freaks her out even more. She starts stepping back, and he’s getting dragged, and we're yelling, "Let her go! Let her go!"

Schmidt: It was like the llamas were little kids playing a trick on their parents — they were all giddy at first. We didn’t know what to do. We were yelling, and Karen, the owner, was yelling, "Put your arms up!"

Freund: We were all yelling. I ran to the back of the trailer, made sure the door was closed, and jumped in the truck. I look in the side mirror and see my second little llama coming out the back of my trailer! The door was closed but not latched. I go check on her, and she sees the other llama running around. And she takes off. I'm just about ready to throw up because I have two llamas running loose. We’re trying to get them rounded up and nothing is working. We have people in walkers and wheelchairs and motorized wheelchairs trying to help us, but this area is so big it can't be contained.

2:48 p.m. ET: Initial news reports begin to circulate on Twitter. Llama tweets begin flooding in at a rate of around 120 tweets per minute.

w.soundcloud.com

3:05 p.m. ET: Articles began to appear reporting that the FCC voted 3-2 to reclassify broadband internet service as a utility. Broadly speaking, the ruling allows the FCC to prevent providers from creating so-called “fast lanes,” where certain companies have to pay extra money for full-fledged fast internet speeds. The ruling was seen as a huge, decisive win for net neutrality advocates and a guarantee of a free and open internet for the coming years. "The American people reasonably expect and deserve an internet that is fast, fair, and open," FCC Chairman Tom Wheeler said during the ruling. "Today they get what they deserve.”

Kate Forscey, associate counsel, government affairs, public knowledge, net neutrality advocate: People really stepped forward and acknowledged that the internet belongs to all of us. I’ve been working on this issue since 2010, but I have colleagues who’ve worked so hard for this for 15 years. We were ecstatic.

The llamas, now free from the backyard space of The Carillons, trot into unknown territory: the sprawling expanse of downtown Sun City. Led by Kahkneeta, the two creatures amble gamely down parkways with grass-lined medians. Early on, they meander with little urgency, utilizing sidewalks with surprising frequency and occasionally pausing to rest on a lawn or in the shade of a roadside tree.

Freund: All of a sudden I hear the lights and sirens, because somebody from the home called the police. It's getting worse and worse. Next thing I knew the llamas broke through whatever little defense we had. Boom. They're in traffic.

Steve Watkins

Schmidt: It got scary, frankly. I headed into my office because there was nothing I could do, and by then the helicopter had come.

Stephen Watkins, news helicopter pilot: The station called us at about 1 p.m. and I remember they were like, "We’ve got some possible horses or llamas loose in Sun City." We’re like, "OK." It usually tends to be some lame mini–petting zoo or something that turns out to be nothing — a knee-jerk reaction because somebody went on social media. But as soon as we pulled up, all of a sudden I see a llama running right down the middle of a big highway, and we’re like, "OH MAN."

Sgt. Philip Hilliker, Maricopa County Sheriff’s Department: At first glance I didn’t really believe what was going on. There's quite a few times you get a call and what's described isn't what's really happening. Figured it was probably somebody dressed in a llama costume or something.

As law enforcement officers attempt to create a perimeter, Kahkneeta and Laney amble their way into dead ends, often sidling suspiciously close to police officers and concerned volunteers. Tense but unhurried, the llamas wait until the last moment to elude their pursuers, summoning a second gear to buck and dodge lunging would-be wranglers.

Watkins: They're darting all over and watching the police and sheriff trailing them with no way to catch them. There was nothing they could do. They'd pull alongside the llamas while they're catching their breath, and the second they'd open the door the llamas would take off. It was so comical watching the cops go in circles. Thank god they didn't try to shoot or anything.

Troy Barrett, news helicopter cameraman: We’re like, "Oh man, this is getting good."

As teams on the ground race to secure the llamas, a nation of deskbound workers watch the chase percolate across Twitter and Facebook. Links to the live chase feed pop up across the internet, and news aggregators begin to GIF the highlights. Fox News cuts into its national broadcast to take the chase live.

“Why are we doing this, you may ask,” Fox News anchor Shepard Smith says on the air. “Well, because we have live pictures of llamas. What would you do? I mean, we got through the ISIS stuff, and, you know, there are other things, and we’ll make time for them — we’ll kill the commercials if we have to.”


Barrett: As people noticed that the news chopper picked it up, they came outside and tried to help. There were old ladies in housecoats and nurses from the hospital that was close. People in chef's coats. This amazing array of people who were coming out to catch this thing. But the llamas weren't having it. It was definitely akin to a police car chase — a very slow, hilarious one.

3:15 p.m.: As if sensing the newfound media attention coming from the hovering helicopters, the llamas split up and begin to gallop down long stretches of open road. The news cameras zoom out from above, revealing to an onlooking nation a majestic, live picture of freedom.

Joe Arpaio, Maricopa County sheriff: I’m very tough on animal cruelty. I’m not saying these llamas were abused or anything, but they could have been put in danger or put the people in danger. I know it made national news and put Sun City on the map, but I’m an animal guy and I’m glad they’re OK. We had an ostrich called Sadie that went missing once in the wilderness, and I sent our helicopter to find her. I took some heat for that. "Why are you spending money on a helicopter to find an ostrich?" they said. Well, that's what we do to protect animals.

At 3:19 p.m., the llamas are cornered in a parking lot. With lasso-wielding pursuers on either side, the llamas decide to split the defense, with Kahkneeta taking the lead. Using superior speed, Kahkneeta eludes all grasps, running into a narrow strip of parking lot, but Laney, who is following behind, is wrangled dramatically by a man in a black shirt and baseball cap.

Minutes later, as Kahkneeta makes her way down a red dirt–lined access road behind Sun City’s hospital, a pickup truck quietly pursues the white llama. In the truck bed, the same man in a black shirt and cap twirls his rope above his head and quickly drive-by lassoes the second llama.

Schmidt, Carillons sales director: Finally, they were lassoed. Both by the same guy, from the back of a pickup truck. The lone mystery man — nobody knows who it is because he took off.

Freund, owner: My understanding is that he's a landscaper. One of the news crews that came to the house that night said they'd tracked him down and he didn't want to talk. They thought maybe he had been involved in something bad or wasn't here legally, perhaps. I don't care if he has a warrant out for himself — he brought it to an end, and that's all I care about. He has some skills.

Watkins: I was so happy for that guy. The only way to catch those guys was to wrangle them like a cowboy. This guy was down there and he was so skilled. He must have been a cowboy or something, because he did it within minutes. I was like, Dang. We’d followed them for a good 40 minutes, thinking, There's no way this ends well. And then this guy just comes up and lassoes them. I mean, what a great ending!

Spredfast, a social media tracking tool, calculated that the llama chase hit its peak at 3:30 p.m. ET on Twitter, with 3,084 tweets per minute. As the afternoon wore on, four of Twitter's top 10 Trending Topics (#LlamaWatch, #TeamLlama, Sun City, White Llama) belonged to the llamas.

Freund: So it’s finally over and I’m putting the llamas in the trailer and I hear one news guy say to another, "How'd you find out about this?" and he goes, "My friend from Virginia called me." I stopped dead in my tracks and go, "VIRGINIA?!"

Schmidt: Phone wouldn’t stop ringing. Jimmy Kimmel called!

Freund: It went nationwide. I threw my phone in my truck trailer and it’s just beeping with texts, Facebook posts. I click on the first Facebook post and it’s a friend saying, "Karen, did you hear about these llamas escaping? So funny! You should’ve been there to help them." And I’m thinking, OH MY GOD!

Lt. Brandon Jones, Maricopa County Sheriff’s Department public information officer: I’m getting calls and I can't answer fast enough. I can't even dial out or send a text, because the phone won't stop ringing. I can't eat my sandwich — I can't do anything. CNN, Fox News, Telemundo. Good Morning America called, and it wasn't during normal hours for them.

Freund: I had voicemails from everyone. I talk to Channel 3 and next thing I knew my whole cul-de-sac is full of news crews. It’s lit up like daylight until 11 p.m. with their trucks, and then starts it again at 3 a.m. when Good Morning America shows up. It was just going on nonstop with CNN and MSNBC — they each spent a day with us. And then the BBC called me. The BBC!

Sheriff Arpaio: I don't want to be egotistical. Usually all this media stuff occurs because of me and my name. On this one, I have to give credit to the animals. They outgunned me on the publicity.

Barrett: It was a very odd but proud moment. We were able to capture this thing, and I don't know…for the lack of something better to say, we broke the internet. In my 12-plus years of being in television, I've covered presidents, earthquakes, all that stuff. But nothing touched the world like two llamas in Sun City.

According to Twitter, there were more than 220,000 global tweets surrounding the escape in just 90 minutes.


“Oh shit, what did I do?"

Minutes after the chase’s dramatic conclusion, as a nation turns back to its neglected work, Cates Holderness, who runs BuzzFeed’s Tumblr page, receives a message from a user named swiked:



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