How to Make Yourself Happy

If you want to make yourself happy, then you have to know what you want and to be comfortable asserting your needs. You also have to make sure you have a positive mindset, take action to live a happier life, and take good care of yourself even if you’re having a rough week.^[1] The most important thing is that you know that happiness is within your reach if you’re willing to work for it.

This article is based on an interview with our matchmaker, Michelle Shahbazyan, founder of The LA Life Coach.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Altering Your Perspective

1. Be who you want to be. If you really want to make yourself happy, then the best thing you can do is to be who you were meant to be. This means not being the person you think your boyfriend, parents, coworkers, or friends want you to be, but the person who feels the most like you.^[2] If you feel like you’re always faking it or putting up a front, then you won’t ever be able to enjoy your life or to truly be happy.^[3]
   
   • You may not even realize that you’re not being true to the person who you are until you pause and check in with yourself. The next time you step out into the world, ask yourself if you’re really being the person you want to be.
   • Sometimes you may just not be the person who you truly want to be yet people find you fun and acceptable which is a sign that you have to change, living up to everyone's expectations of course doesn't seem right, more importantly you should prefer to live up to your own expectations and don't forget to set the right expectations.
   • Of course, there are times when you have to act a certain way to conform to socially acceptable behaviour; for example, you probably shouldn’t jump up and down on your desk at school or work to be true to who you are. However, in general, you should seize as many opportunities as you can to be yourself.
2. Think positively. Though sometimes you may think that it’s impossible to think positively, being positive is something you can actively pursue, no matter your circumstances.^[4] If you want to be able to think positively, all you have to do is to focus on the things you’re grateful for and excited about, and learn not to dwell on the negative stuff. If you focus on talking and thinking about the good things in your life, then you’ll be more likely to feel optimistic. ^[5]
   
   • If you catch yourself making a negative comment, try to counter it with two or three positive ones.^[6]
   • Even just making an effort to smile will not only make the people around you feel happier, but it will make you happier too. Convincing yourself to smile occasionally and naturally is a bit tough but once you achieve it the results just won't disappoint you.
   • Though complaining can help make you feel better occasionally but complaining in itself is overlooking the positive aspects of life and paying greater attention to the negative ones, if you make a habit of it, then you’ll naturally be more likely to feel pessimistic.
3. Live in the present. One way to make yourself happy is to focus on the world right in front of you instead of worrying about the past or the future. Though it’s not always easy to forget past mistakes or to stop being anxious about the future, the more you make a habit of focusing on the present moment, the more likely you’ll be to make yourself happy. You can have a set time each day for worrying about the future or dreading the past, but you should push those thoughts aside if you want to enjoy your daily interactions also while thinking about the future or past one forgets about the present and the present time is the only time when you have some power to act.^[7]
   
   • If you have trouble living in the present, try yoga or meditation. These daily activities can help you feel centered.
   • Think about it: so something frustrating happened at work, and now it’s keeping you from enjoying your time at home with your family. Why not compartmentalize instead of letting one event ruin all of the events after it?
   • Plus, if you focus more on the present, then you’ll be more attuned to the work you’re doing and will be better at listening to the people in your life. Even if something frustrating happened at work or anywhere no use of bringing it up again and again to the present moment it is just as if you are trying to live the frustrating moment again and again which doesn't seem right or does it?
4. Be grateful for what you do have. Another way to make yourself happy is to make gratitude a priority. Sit down with a piece of paper and write down all of the things you’re grateful for; tell yourself you won’t stop writing until you’ve filled a page. Take the time to read these items aloud, and to be truly thankful for all of the joy and happiness in your life; you can be grateful for something as important as your health as well as something more simple, such as the delicious coffee at your favourite cafe down the street.^[8]
   
   • Make a habit of cultivating gratitude. If something good happens to you, make a note of how grateful you are for it; if you’re on the lookout for things you should be grateful for, you’ll find that you have much more to be happy about than you thought.
   • Take the time to thank people for what they’ve done for you, whether they’ve done something big or small. This shows that you’re paying attention.
5. Take a step back from your situation. Another way to make yourself happy is to get some perspective. Take a step back and look at your situation from the outside; sure, you may be having some bumps in your relationship or you may be putting in too many hours at work recently, but on the whole, you have a roof over your head, some love and joy in your life, and many other things to be grateful for. It’s easy to feel miserable when just one or two things in your life are going wrong, but if you want to make a habit of happiness, then you have to practice looking at the big picture.^[9]
   
   • This may be the last thing you want to hear when you feel truly miserable, but it’s important to think about how, from the outside, your life may look pretty rosy, even if you don’t feel that way.
   • Even the fact that you have access to the internet and can find help here is a sign that your situation isn’t as dire as you may think.
6. Get more comfortable about being selfish. One of the reasons you may feel like you’re unable to make yourself happy is because you’re always putting other people before yourself. Now, this doesn’t mean you should kick everyone else to the curb and only look out for #1, but it does mean that you should spend more time thinking about your own goals, desires, and needs. If you routinely put your friends, significant others, and family members above yourself, then you should find a way to compromise and make yourself happier.^[10]
   
   • If you feel like you’re in a relationship where you’re sacrificing everything for the other person, then have a conversation about it. You can’t keep this up forever if you want to be happy.
   • Learn to speak up for yourself. If your friend has picked the movie you’re going to watch together the last five times, it’s your turn to make a call. If you start small with asserting what you want, you’ll soon be able to make bigger decisions.
7. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself. One way to change your perspective for the better is to spend more time with people who make you feel like a great person who is capable of great things. If you spend all of your time around people who put you down or make you feel insecure and like you can’t do anything on your own, then it’s unlikely that you’ll be making yourself happy any time soon.^[11]
   
   • Take stock. Look around you and see which people really make you feel good and which make you feel terrible about yourself. If you find that you spend the majority of your time around people who make you feel inadequate, then it’s time to cut those ties.
   • It’s nearly impossible to be happy if everyone around you is making you feel worthless. Though it may hurt to cut ties with people who have been in your life for a while, you have to get in the business of looking out for yourself.

[Edit]Taking Action

1. Address your troubles. One way to make yourself happy is to stop brushing all of the things that are troubling you under the rug. Though it’s important to feel like you can be happy through willpower alone, sometimes you won’t be able to get there until you address the factors in your life that are making you less happy.^[12] Taking action to make your life better is admirable and takes hard work.^[13]
   
   • If you know you’re in a relationship that just isn’t working, end it as soon as you can instead of waiting for things to sort themselves out.
   • If you’re profoundly unhappy because you hate your job, find the inner motivation to find a better one.
   • If you’re insecure or lack confidence about some aspect of yourself, take steps to love the person you are by going to therapy, making small improvements, or by making a game plan for happiness.
2. Manage your stress. In order to make yourself happy, you have to be able to deal with the stressful situations that life throws at you. Though you can take some steps to lower the stressful situations in your life, in the end, it’s still important to have coping mechanisms for dealing with stress if you want to be happy. Make an effort to face stressful situations in your life head-on instead of brushing them under the rug and waiting for them to blow up in your face. Here are some ways to manage your stress:^[14]
   
   • Have someone to talk to about it. Whether it’s your friend, family member, or a therapist, you shouldn’t have to deal with stress alone.
   • Find ways to make your life easier. If you’re constantly stressed because you get stuck in traffic every morning and have to rush to work, leave the house just 15 minutes earlier each day.
   • See if you have too much on your plate. If you feel like you’re taking on five responsibilities too many, see what you can cut out of your life to make it more manageable.
   • Find a winding down routine for yourself. This can mean reading a captivating novel, taking a long walk, or drinking chamomile tea. Find your routine and stick to it.
3. Make time to do what you love. One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make sure you set aside some time to do what you love, whether it’s cooking, writing a novel, or spending time in nature. Even spending just 30 minutes a day doing your favorite thing in the world can have a huge impact on your happiness throughout the rest of your day; look at your schedule and see what you can do to make room for the things you love.
   
   • If you find that the only way you can do what you love is to wake up half an hour earlier, then so be it. As long as you still feel well rested, this will be a great way to kick off your day.
   • Make time for what you love even when you’re extremely busy. If you’re absolutely miserable because you hate your job and feel like you’re spending every free second out of work looking for a different job, then ask yourself if spending just half an hour a day writing the poetry you love to write will really have a big impact on your job search. The amount of joy generated by doing what you love will make the rest of your day feel more manageable.
4. Set goals and meet them.^[15] If you want to take action to make yourself happier, then one thing you can do is to set tangible goals for yourself and work to meet them. This will give you a sense of purpose and will increase your drive and will make it easier for you to attain happiness. Making small goals to reach the bigger goals will help you feel happier along the way to your ultimate destination; if you feel like you’ll only be happy if you reach the ultimate goal, then you’ll be miserable along the way.^[16]
   
   • Make a list of your goals and cross them off as you achieve them. This will make you feel happier and more fulfilled.
   • There’s nothing wrong will setting easier goals for yourself, at first. This can help you feel motivated to continue.
5. Write in your diary. One way to make yourself happy is to take the time to write in your diary at least a few times a week. This can help you reflect, take stock of your emotions, spend some time with yourself, and to feel like you can get some perspective on your life. If you never stop to write down your thoughts or slow down long enough to think, then you’ll never be able to get any perspective.^[17]
   
   • Make an appointment with yourself to write in your diary at least once a week. Remind yourself that this is important to your happiness.
   • Read over your diary every few weeks to see if you can get a better sense of what makes you happy and unhappy.
6. Get out of the house. Another simple yet important thing you should do to make yourself happier is to get out of the house more often. Just being in the sunshine, walking around your neighborhood, and breathing some fresh air can make you feel much happier than if you’re cooped up in your dark home, typing away at your computer until your hands ache. If you work from home or just spend a lot of time there, make sure to get out at least 2-3 times a day so you feel happier.^[18]
   
   • If you get out of the house, even if it’s to do something you were going to do at home, then you’ll feel happier just because you’ll be surrounded by people.
   • Make an effort to make plans with your friends just to get out there; don’t let yourself wallow or stay in your bed for too long.
7. Make other people happy. It’s been proven that making other people happy will actually make you happy in turn. Whether you’re doing small favors for a friend who needs it, helping your neighbor take care of his dog, or volunteering in your community, just taking the time to help other people will make you feel happier because you’ll feel like you are able to make a difference in another person’s life. If you’re only focused on yourself, then you’re much more likely to get disappointed or to not be able to see the forest for the trees.^[19]
   
   • Make it a habit to do something nice for someone you know just because. You don’t need to get someone a gift or do something nice for a person just because it’s his or her birthday; sometimes the most treasured gestures are done spontaneously.
   • You may think you have no free time, but making time to volunteer just 1-2 times a month can really cheer you up and give you a sense of purpose.
8. Make your space clean and organized. Though it may sound silly, taking the time to make your personal space as clean and organized as possible can actually have a huge impact on your level of happiness. If you take the time to remove the clutter from your space, to take out the trash or throw out worthless items, and to donate items that are in good condition but which you never use, you’ll actually feel happier because you’ll be more able to breathe in your own space.^[20]
   
   • Even if you only take 10 minutes a day to slowly sort through your clutter, you’ll be able to feel a big difference.
   • If you live in a space that is messy, disorganized, and even dirty, then you’re much more likely to feel suffocated, lost, and unhappy. If you restore a sense of order to your living space, you’ll feel like there’s more order in your life.

[Edit]Taking Care of Yourself

1. Get enough sleep. If you want to make yourself happy, then you have to make sure your basic needs are met. One of these needs is being well-rested; if you want to be happy, then you have to make an effort to get 7-9 hours of sleep, or however much sleep it is your body truly needs. You should also go to bed and wake up around the same time every day so it’s easier for you to fall asleep every night and wake up every morning.^[21]
   
   • Create a relaxing bedtime routine that makes it easier for you to fall asleep. Turn off all electronics at least an hour before bed.
   • Don’t sacrifice sleep for fun. It’ll be hard for you to be happy if you feel exhausted or even just ready to conk out for an hour or two.
2. Find at least 30 minutes to relax every day. You should make an effort to relax for at least thirty minutes a day no matter how busy you are. You can’t spend every second of your day doing something productive or your head will explode. You have to be generous with yourself and give yourself at least 30 minutes to unwind and do something completely frivolous, relaxing, and fun. This can mean reading gossip magazines, watching your favorite TV show, or talking to your best friend on the phone.^[22]
   
   • Whatever you do, make sure it’s purposeful and that you know you’re designating the time for relaxation. This can help your mind and body relax as you do something just for yourself.
   • Everyone has a different way of relaxing. If you relax by taking a walk or writing some poetry, then go for it.
3. Eat healthy meals. Another thing you can do to take care of yourself and to make yourself happier is to make sure to eat three healthy and balanced meals a day. This will help your mind be sharper, will give you energy, and will keep you from feeling slow and sluggish. No matter how busy you are, you should be mindful about what you eat, knowing that it really will have a positive impact on your happiness.^[23]
   
   • Don’t skip breakfast, no matter how busy you are. You need to start your day off on the right foot, and to get the energy you need to feel good about your day.
   • Eat a healthy mixture of fruits and veggies, lean proteins, and healthy carbohydrates with each meal. This can help you feel a sense of balance.
   • You can have healthy snacks throughout the day, such as almonds, yogurt, carrot sticks, or peanut butter and celery. This will give you an energy boost without making you crash.
   • Of course, everyone needs to have something sugary or fatty once in a while; it’s okay to let yourself splurge occasionally. If you never let yourself eat what you want, then you’re much less likely to feel happy.
4. Get plenty of exercise. Making time for at least 30 minutes of exercise a day can get your endorphins pumping and can make you feel happier and healthier. Whether you’re taking a walk or going biking, it’s important to make time for exercise so that your mind and body feel healthier and so you feel happier in the process.^[24]
   
   • You can consider joining a soccer or basketball team or a road runner’s club; having a social element to your exercise can make you feel happier.
   • Make an effort to move around more in general. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Walk instead of driving. These little actions can make a big difference.
5. Find joy in your relationships with friends and family. Making time to be social can help you feel happier about yourself and your life. No matter how busy you are, taking the time to check in with a close friend or a family member at least a few times a week can help you feel happier and less alone. Make sure you really listen to the person, share your own feelings, and unwind a bit in the process.^[25]
   
   • If you need a shoulder to cry on, then a friend or family member can be a great asset. However, friends can make you feel happier even if you’re already in a good mood, by reflecting your own positive feelings.
   • Plug at least 1-2 social events into your calendar unless you’re having a really busy week. You’d be surprised by how much the energy of other people can lift your spirits.
6. Practice good hygiene. You may not think that hygiene has much do with happiness, but you’d be surprised by how big of a difference taking care of yourself will really make in your daily life. Just showering or bathing daily, washing your hair, brushing your teeth, and grooming yourself can make you feel more positive about yourself and can make you happier overall; it’s much more difficult to be happy if you haven’t showered in a few days.^[26]
   
   • You don’t need to be the best dressed person in the world to feel happy. However, making an effort with your appearance really can improve your mood.
   • If you look and feel sloppy, then you’re more likely to be sloppy with your actions, too.
7. Have a home pampering day. If you want to make yourself happy, one thing you can do is to spend some time on pampering yourself right at home. Take a day off work or school and take the time to relax, take a hot bath, put on a hair or face mask, or just to lie down in soft candlelight and listen to music. Be generous with yourself and know when it’s time to just kick back and spoil yourself a little bit.^[27]
   
   • You can also consider getting a massage or giving one to yourself. This can help your mind and body relax and can help you feel happier.
   • Remember that you deserve to be taken care of, no matter how busy you are. Taking the time to give your body the attention it needs will make you happier before you know it.

[Edit]Video

[Edit]Related wikiHows

• Make Yourself Feel Better

[Edit]References

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
2. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/reinvent-yourself/201409/how-do-you-reinvent-yourself-be-who-you-want-be
4. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
5. ↑ https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/positive_thinking_makes_a_difference
6. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
7. ↑ https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2018/04/harvard-researchers-study-how-mindfulness-may-change-the-brain-in-depressed-patients/
8. ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_gratitude_changes_you_and_your_brain
9. ↑ https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/09/180924102858.htm
10. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/progress-not-perfection/201106/its-ok-be-selfish
11. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201504/5-reasons-studies-say-you-have-choose-your-friends
12. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
13. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-we-worry/201206/10-tips-manage-your-worrying
14. ↑ https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/manage-stress.aspx
15. ↑ [v161309_b02]. 18 March 2020.
16. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/coaching-and-parenting-young-athletes/201311/keys-effective-goal-setting
17. ↑ http://newsroom.ucla.edu/stories/writing-in-a-diary-can-reduce-83950
18. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-guest-room/200901/top-10-ways-banish-depression-now
19. ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/kindness_makes_you_happy_and_happiness_makes_you_kind
20. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-truisms-wellness/201607/the-powerful-psychology-behind-cleanliness
21. ↑ https://www.apa.org/action/resources/research-in-action/sleep-deprivation.aspx
22. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolutionary-psychiatry/201811/ready-set-relax
23. ↑ https://www.livescience.com/55407-eating-more-fruits-veggies-linked-with-life-satisfaction.html
24. ↑ https://www.apa.org/monitor/2011/12/exercise.aspx
25. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/positive-psychology-in-the-classroom/201210/friendship-the-key-happiness
26. ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/Cleanliness
27. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/choke/201201/feeling-lonely-take-warm-bath

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How to Do Inclined Sit Ups

If you’re looking to build core strength, sit ups can be a useful exercise as they increase strength and flexibility in your abdominal muscles. Doing sit ups on an incline bench are more effective than regular sit ups, as there is a wider range of motion. This exercise strengthens your rectus abdominis, or your "six-pack muscle." You can even add weights or adjust the incline for an additional challenge.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Getting in the Starting Position

1. Find an incline bench. This exercise will work best if you have a support bar, or foot brace, under which to hook your feet as well.
   
2. Set the decline angle. You should start with an angle between 30 and 45 degrees. The higher the angle, the harder the sit ups will be.^[1]
   
3. Sit on the bench with your knees bent. Your feet should be on the inclined (higher) side of the bench and your head should be at the declined (lower) side of the bench. Hook your legs under the foot brace or support bar.
   
4. Lie down so that your upper body is declined. Cup your hands over your ears or hold the tips of your ears with your fingertips. Avoid placing your hands behind your neck, as this can lead to injury when the head and neck are pushed too far forward.^[2]
   

[Edit]Performing the Exercise

1. Raise yourself from the bench by bending your waist and hips. Make sure your abs stay tightened and your back is straight. You should raise up until your upper body is completely vertical.^[3]
   
2. Lower yourself down slowly. You should slowly lower your body until the back of your shoulders touch the bench. Keep your back straight and your abs tight.^[4]
   
3. Repeat for the desired number of repetitions. Try to do 10 repetitions of this exercise per set. Repeat until you've completed 3 sets.^[5]
   

[Edit]Challenging Yourself

1. Increase the incline. Increasing the incline makes the exercise more challenging. If you’ve got the hang of this exercise and want to challenge yourself, increase the incline by 5-10 degrees.^[6]
   
   • The bench will have a knob which allows you to lift and position the high end of the bench even higher.
2. Add weights.^[7] For a more challenging sit up, you can hold a weight against your chest, with your arms crossed over top of it. Be careful not to drop the weight and hurt yourself.^[8]
   
   • Use a weight plate (used on bench press bars) rather than free weights.
3. Increase the frequency. If you start out doing this exercise once or twice per week, increase that to three to four times per week. The more sit ups you do, the better results you will see.^[9]
   

[Edit]Video

[Edit]Tips

• A well-rounded abdominal workout includes additional exercises like the plank, leg lifts, and the bicycle exercise.

[Edit]Warnings

• Limit the number of sets and repetitions you perform of this exercise, as this movement pattern is attributed to lower back injuries.
• Potential injuries to your back and neck may be incurred if this exercise is performed incorrectly.
• Abdominal exercises should always be matched with exercises for the spinal erector muscles in the back, so do moves like the Superman in conjunction with inclined sit ups.

[Edit]Things You Need

• Incline board with foot brace
• Weight plate

[Edit]Related wikiHows

• Get Six Pack Abs Fast
• Do Sit Ups
• Do a Push Up

[Edit]References

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://www.muscleandstrength.com/exercises/decline-situp.html
2. ↑ https://exrx.net/WeightExercises/RectusAbdominis/WtInclineSitUpX
3. ↑ https://exrx.net/WeightExercises/RectusAbdominis/WtInclineSitUpX
4. ↑ https://exrx.net/WeightExercises/RectusAbdominis/WtInclineSitUpX
5. ↑ https://www.muscleandstrength.com/exercises/decline-situp.html
6. ↑ https://www.muscleandstrength.com/exercises/decline-situp.html
7. ↑ [v161318_b01]. 26 March 2020.
8. ↑ https://exrx.net/WeightExercises/RectusAbdominis/WtInclineSitUpX
9. ↑ https://exrx.net/WeightExercises/RectusAbdominis/BWInclineSitUp

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How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Overcoming comparison to become the best version of yourself

It’s natural to compare yourself to others (and even envy them) if you hop on your social media for a few minutes. With just a few scrolls, you’re bombarded with vacation photos, status updates, and glossy ads. But, it doesn’t mean you have to “keep up” to live a content and meaningful life. In this article, we’ll teach you how to avoid certain triggers so you can stop comparing yourself to others. If your comparative thoughts are dragging you down, keep scrolling to discover some effective coping strategies.

[Edit]Things You Should Know

• Identify the people or events that prompt your comparative behavior, and write down your negative thoughts so you can limit your exposure to these triggers.
• Make a list of your strengths and accomplishments so you can focus on the positive aspects of your life.
• Set screen time limits for your social media to minimize your comparative thoughts, or mute accounts that make you feel “behind” in life.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]How to Overcome Comparison

1. Identify your triggers and avoid them. To stop comparing yourself to others, pay attention to the people or events that prompt your behavior. Do you feel discontent with your life after looking at luxury goods? Is there someone who constantly makes you feel bad about yourself? Write down your comparative thoughts as soon as they happen so you can limit your exposure to these situations (or avoid them altogether).^[1]
   
   • By tracking and acknowledging the way comparison makes you feel, you're more likely to change your negative behavior.
   • If you’re struggling to find the cause of your comparative behavior, you can also assess your self-esteem. Do you have a positive opinion about yourself? Do let others greatly impact your mood? If you care a lot about what other people think of you, it may be a sign to work on your happiness and improve your self confidence.
2. Write down your positive traits. When you minimize your abilities, it becomes easier to compare yourself to others—you might focus on their strengths and ignore your own completely. To avoid this negative behavior, make a list of your strengths and talents—whether it's being a good listener or having a great sense of style. By acknowledging your best qualities, you can learn to love yourself and boost your self-esteem.^[2]
   
   • To remind yourself of your positive traits, write them down on a sticky note and post it on your bathroom mirror or somewhere you will see every day.
   • When you’re feeling down or insecure, repeat the list aloud to fight negative thinking. You could say, “I am genuine. I am a loyal friend. I am an incredible photographer.”
   • If you’re having trouble creating a list, ask a trusted friend or family member what they think your best qualities are—they might mention something you never thought of before.
3. Keep a gratitude journal. A gratitude journal helps you recognize the things you may take for granted so you can fully appreciate them. To start journaling, reflect on the little things that bring you joy and write down why you’re grateful for them. By acknowledging the positive aspects of your life, you can shift your focus from others to yourself.^[3]
   
   • Instead of listing things you're grateful for, explain how they impact your life in detail. For example, if you jog in the park every day, you might express how you’re grateful for your health and how jogging helps you combat stress at work.
   • You can also practice gratitude every day by adopting an appreciative and open attitude. Pay attention to the compliments you receive or random gestures of kindness from others, no matter how small they seem.
   • Keeping a gratitude journal can increase your chances of overcoming comparison, but you may forget about it if you have a busy schedule. Set a reminder to write at least once a week so you can actively express appreciation.
4. Appreciate others instead of envying them. Consider the advantage that others can bring you. If you have friends who are highly achieving people, you might consider that their networks are full of people who might be able to help you become more successful in your life. Instead of envying their success, be supportive and use their success to your advantage.^[4]
   
   • For example, you might look at pictures of athletes to admire their fitness. Instead of feeling inferior and jealous, you can use these as motivation to make changes in your life. You could change your eating habits and get more exercise so you’re using the pictures productively instead of negatively.
5. Work on improving your abilities. Instead of focusing on your “weaknesses,” reflect on the areas you can improve. Take classes, workshops, or lessons to hone your skills and techniques, and don’t be afraid to ask other people for help along the way. By prioritizing yourself, you can boost your self-confidence and find your place and value.^[5]
   
   • Remember that perfection is an unproductive thought pattern where one holds an unrealistic ideal as a standard of achievement. Recognize that everyone's circumstances are entirely unique, but you can always work on improving your abilities to make yourself happy.
6. Compete against yourself. Instead of comparing your life to other people, use comparison to become an improved version of yourself. Set goals for yourself and try to improve your own personal best. Achieving these goals can help you establish a set of experiences separate from others’ expectations.^[6]
   
   • When you set a goal for yourself, track your progress so that you can see how you are moving toward that goal. That way, you can focus on yourself and not on other people.
   • For example, if you’re training for a marathon, run for a longer distance each week until you hit the 26-mile mark, and track how much improvement you see every week. By charting your progress, you can see how far you’ve come and how much further you have to go.
7. Judge yourself by your own standards. When you consider your background and current situation, you can reduce the competition you feel towards others because their expectations are not yours. For example, if you’re taking longer to get a graduate degree than some of your friends, think about how you are also working full-time or caring for your elderly parents.^[7]
   
   • Remember that everyone has different levels of privilege that impact their life—whether it’s time, money, or resources. Your journey is unique to you, so be patient as you work toward your goals.
8. Decrease your exposure to social media outlets. If you find that idealistic representations in the media are having a negative effect on your self-esteem, take a break from social media. For example, if you always feel “behind” in life after scrolling through Instagram, you can mute certain accounts or disable your account altogether.^[8]
   
   • You can also set screen time limits for social media apps. If you have an iPhone, go to your general settings and hit “Screen Time.” Scroll down and select “App Limits,” then program your app settings to 20-30 minutes a day or every other day.
   • When you set time limits for your social media, you can spend more time with your loved ones and learn to appreciate your reality. Gradually reduce your limit even more by setting your screen time to 10 minutes a day (or less).
9. Avoid media that shows idealistic images. If you frequently compare yourself to entertainers or influencers, limit your exposure to magazines, TV shows, or movies that feature them. Even temporary exposure to media depicting ideal images has been shown to impact self-esteem and self-image negatively.^[9]
   
   • For example, if you feel bad about your body after seeing photos of a specific model, you can stop reading popular fashion publications or block their profile on social media.
10. Use social media in a positive way. While everyone is guilty of mindless scrolling, you can make a conscious effort to control what you consume online. Instead of following accounts that give you FOMO, replace them with educational, informative, or inspirational pages. These accounts can inspire you to become a better version of yourself, boosting your self-esteem and minimizing your comparative behavior.^[10]
    
    • For example, if you want to achieve a better physical condition, you can follow fitness and healthy eating pages. If you want to improve your mind and personality, try following brain and psychology-related accounts.
    • Try to view social media as a platform to connect with loved ones, discover small businesses, and support your local community.
11. Be kind to yourself. If you’re always comparing yourself to others, you might develop a negative (and inaccurate) image of yourself. Treat yourself with the same kindness, support, and concern you’d show to a close friend, and give yourself a mental break if you feel overwhelmed or anxious.^[11]
    
    • Remember to nurture your body as well. Exercise regularly, eat an array of colors, and try to get at least 7 hours of sleep a day.
12. Talk to a trusted friend or family member. When you constantly compare yourself to others and internalize these thoughts, you can feel even more inadequate or depressed. Discuss your comparative behavior with a loved one to release any negative beliefs and help you process your emotions—you might be surprised to hear they feel the same way as you.^[12]
    
    • If you don't have a close friend or family member to talk to, seek professional help. You can find a therapist online with services like Better Help or Good Therapy.
13. Be your own coach. Think of yourself as your personal coach, pushing you toward excellence. Give love and appreciation for your efforts, but don’t be afraid to take small risks and challenge yourself. By setting attainable goals for yourself, you can raise your self-esteem, instead of lowering it.^[13]
    
    • Even if you don't reach a specific goal, give yourself credit for trying in the first place and focus on how you can move forward.
14. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. When you compare yourself with others, you may start to view yourself negatively. If you have negative thoughts about yourself, tell yourself to change those thoughts into something about yourself that you are proud of.
    
    • For example, if you think someone else is a better writer than you, you might tell yourself, “I may not be the best writer, but I can draw very well. Besides, if I want to improve in writing, I can work towards this goal for myself instead of envying others for their talent."
    • Alternatively, distract yourself if you start to go down a comparison spiral. If you feel bad after talking to someone successful, listen to your favorite album or go for a long walk outside.
15. Start thinking realistically. Idealistic images in the media cannot always be avoided, so be aware if you're comparing yourself to them. Most people only post the highlights of their lives, so try to remind yourself that you don’t know what’s really happening in their realities.^[14]
    
    • For example, if you envy the perfect relationship that a friend has with her spouse, remember how difficult it was for her to find that partner and the challenges she may have faced. Empathy will replace jealousy.
    • If you see someone with the body, car, or life you want, try to think of actions you can take to get yourself closer to these goals and write them down.
16. Take control over your own life. Although it can be hard to resist comparing yourself to others, remind yourself that you ultimately create your own reality. If you acknowledge your ability to create the life you desire, you have control over the outcome (so there’s no need to compare your life to others).^[15]
    
    • At the end of the day, you know yourself best, so make decisions for yourself—not for anyone else!

[Edit]Why do I compare myself to others?

1. Comparison allows you to evaluate your life to see where you can improve. Since it gives you information about how you measure up to others, comparison is a natural feedback loop that can motivate you to work harder or change your behavior to achieve a certain goal. Without the ability to compare yourself to someone, you cannot tell if you have progressed at all—it’s a major component of identity and self-improvement.^[16]
   
   • For example, if your friend has a larger house than you, it can encourage you to work harder and make more money (so you can purchase a similar house).

[Edit]Why Comparison is Harmful

1. Too much comparison can lead to low self-esteem or depression. While comparing yourself to others is perfectly normal, it can negatively affect your self-esteem if you let it consume you. Comparison can discourage you from following your dreams if you aren’t achieving the same goals or milestones as your peers, and it can highlight the differences in skills, knowledge, and experience.^[17]
   
   • Remember that idealizing someone is unrealistic. Everyone has something they can work on, and you might be hyperfocusing on their positive qualities—instead of viewing them from a broad perspective.
   • Overcoming comparison is a continuous process, but it is possible! Instead of using other people as a benchmark for your success, use comparison to help structure your goals and work on self-improvement. With time and practice, you can become the best version of yourself, for yourself.

[Edit]Video

[Edit]Related wikiHows

• Be Yourself
• Be Happy
• Release Anger
• Stop Taking Things Personally

[Edit]References

 

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/social-comparison-theory#the-dangers-of-comparison
2. ↑ https://charliewaller.org/mental-health-resources/confidence-and-self-esteem/stop-comparing-yourself-to-others
3. ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/tips_for_keeping_a_gratitude_journal
4. ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-stop-comparing-yourself-to-others
5. ↑ https://cen.acs.org/careers/employment/Jealous-peers-stop-comparing-yourself/96/i46
6. ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-stop-comparing-yourself-to-others
7. ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-stop-comparing-yourself-to-others
8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap
9. ↑ https://www.heartsempowerment.com/single-post/how-to-stop-comparing-yourself-to-people-on-social-media
10. ↑ https://www.heartsempowerment.com/single-post/how-to-stop-comparing-yourself-to-people-on-social-media
11. ↑ https://charliewaller.org/mental-health-resources/confidence-and-self-esteem/stop-comparing-yourself-to-others
12. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap
13. ↑ https://bschool.pepperdine.edu/newsroom/articles/jaclyn-margolis-highlights-advantages-upside-social-comparison-psychology-today.htm
14. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap
15. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap
16. ↑ https://wp.nyu.edu/mind/2021/02/27/why-do-we-compare-ourselves-to-others
17. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/bouncing-back/201508/3-reasons-stop-comparing-yourself-others

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How to Drink Beer

There are many common misconceptions as to how beer should be stored, poured and enjoyed. We'll start out with how to find the right beer, the right glass, and the right food pairing. Then we'll get into pouring, storing, and enjoying. Beer 101? Check.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Getting the Best Taste

1. Choose the right beer. Gone are the days when you thought beer only came out of a keg and into a red plastic cup. There are an infinite amount of varieties out there, meaning there's a beer out there that matches your ideal taste.^[1] Here's a brief and not-at-all comprehensive rundown (that would take ages):^[2]
   
   • Ales. These ferment quickly and are generally a bit sweeter, fuller-bodied, and have a fruity flavor. Indian Pale Ales (IPAs) have more hops and are generally bitter. This category includes pale ales, wheat beers, bitters, porters, stouts, barley wines, brown ales and tripels. Watch out for tripels – they've been fermented several times and can knock you off your feet.
   • Lagers. These ferment slowly and tend to have a "crisper" flavor than ales and are, in general, less "hoppy." Think of Heineken, Bud Light, Natural Light, Harp, Corona, Miller Genuine Draft – these are all light lagers.^[3] This category also includes pilsners, Vienna lagers, bocks and martens.
   • Stouts. These really fall under the "ale" umbrella, but they are their own beast. A stout is dark and often creamy, with tastes of chocolate and coffee undertones. There are also oatmeal and oyster stouts, too. For these, think Guinness, Beamish, and Samuel Smith Oatmeal Stouts.
   • Bitters. These are English ales that have a deep bronze look and a well-hopped flavor (in other words, bitter). In general, they have greater depth than IPAs. It's hard to qualify their taste beyond that as there are several categories: session or ordinary bitter, best or regular bitter, and premium or strong bitter (often called Extra Special Bitters (ESB)).
   • Wheat Beer (or Hefeweizen). This is an ale with a light yet hazy appearance. It often has a slight banana or clove flavor. Sometimes it's spicy or apple-y, too. It's not bitter and it's often served with a wedge of lemon.
2. Choose the right glass for the right beer. Just like red wines and white wines (and hard liquors) need to be treated differently and put it in different glasses, the same goes for different varieties of beer.^[4] Here's a few things to consider:^[5]
   
   • Mugs – good for IPAs, red, black, brown, and blonde American Ales, Pilsner, English Stouts, smoked beer, witbier, American and English Porters
   • Pint glasses – good for American Ales, IPAs, Pale Ales, English Bitter and mild English Ales, cream ales, dark Lager, and Stouts.
   • Goblets: Belgian IPAs and strong, dark ales, quadruples, and tripels
   • Pilsner glasses: Vienna and Japanese lagers, Euro dark and strong lagers, American malt liquors, pale and red lagers, doppelbocks
   • Weizen glasses: Dark and pale wheat ales, and all "weizens"
3. Choose the right beer to complement your meal. Beer pairs just as well – if not better – with food like wine. And in general, it's the same idea: lighter foods like salads and fish go with lighter beers. Heavier foods and meatier meats go with darker beers. You should also pair "regional" beers with the food of that region. Apart from that, here are a few things to remember:^[6]
   
   • Does your beer have a caramel, cocoa, or coffee flavor? Pair it with a smokey flavor, like with char-grilled foods.
   • Is your beer hoppy? This can provide an herbal contract to fattier foods, like salmon, pizza, and fried foods.
   • Is your beer sweet and fruity? Think appetizer plates, like grapes, cheeses, and bruschetta.

[Edit]Pouring Your Beer Correctly

1. Choose a beer that's been stored properly in a cool, dark location. It's important to store your beer in a cool area, away from direct light, heat and in a constant temperature. Ideally, most beers should be kept around . Anything higher and the lifespan of your beer will be shortened; anything lower and you'll make it hazy or cloudy.
   
   • Wanna get technical? Strong beers (like barleywines, tripels, and dark ales) will be best enjoyed when kept just below room temperature, around 55-60F. Standard ales (like bitters, IPAs, doppelbocks, lambics, stouts, etc) should be at "cellar temperature, 50-55F. Lighter beers (think lagers, pilsners, wheat beers, milds, etc) should be around refrigerated temperature, or 45-50F.^[7][8]
   • Think of it this way: the higher the alcohol content, the higher the temperature required, and vice versa.
2. Grab a clean class. A dirty glass may contain oils or grime that interferes with the true flavor of your beer. Also, it's just a little gross. To be sure, run your glass under hot water; use soap and water if necessary. Hold it up to the light to inspect for smudges and oil.
   
   • Don't mix your glasses, either. If it's a beer glass, use it as just a beer glass. Try putting beer in a milk glass and you'll get the picture.
   • It helps to chill the glass ahead of time.^[9]
3. Pour the beer in at a 45-degree angle. For the perfect beer, you need about 1" to 1-1/2" of "head" (the foamy stuff), or about .^[10] To get at this, start by pouring the beer into your perfect glass at a 45-degree angle. The beer should stream down the midpoint of the side of the glass, allowing it to aerate. This creates the "head".
   
   • Having a head is very important to get to the true flavors of the beer. No head and you'll lose what makes your beer tasty and delicious. It'll also provide a stronger, more decadent aroma.
   • You can also tilt the glass to the side at an angle when pouring the beer in.^[11]
4. Level the glass and start to pour straight in. When the glass becomes half full, start leveling it out slowly, pouring straight into the glass. This minimizes the head created, giving you the perfect amount.
   
   • If your head is forming too quickly (this happens with some beers), start pouring straight down the middle sooner. If it's not forming, keep it at an angle.
5. Alternatively, try the double-pour method. Some people believe in the double-pour method as it supposedly increases the aroma and releases the flavors. This is especially true with Guinness (if that's how they do it in Dublin, it's best to follow suit). Here's how it's done:
   
   • Pour the glass half full, accumulating a large head
   • Let the head dissipate slightly
   • Pour again, aiming for that 1" to 1-1/2" of the head in total

[Edit]Tasting Your Beer the Right Way

1. Look at your beer. Want to analyze your beer and learn which ones you love, which ones you loathe, and why? Start by looking at your beer, marveling at its color and body. Raise it in front of you, but not to the light (that'll make it appear lighter than it is). What do you notice?
   
   • Think about the head. Is it foamy? Creamy? Quick to disappear?
   • Consider its color. Is it more golden, red, or chestnut?
   • Look at its consistency. Is it creamy? Thick or thin? Hazy with debris or clean as a whistle?
2. Swirl your beer a bit. Just like you swirl around a glass of good red wine, swirl around your beer. This releases the aromas and fragrances of your particular beer. It pulls out the nuances and tests its head retention.
   
   • How does this beer differ from other beers you're used to when you swirl it around? How does the carbonation loosen? What happens from the bottom to the top of the beer?
3. Smell it. Most the taste is smell, after all. Take the first whiff through your nose. What do you sense? Fruits? Bread? Chocolate? Then take a whiff through your mouth (yes, the two are connected). Does it change at all?
   
   • If need be, swirl it around again. Does this intensify the smell?
4. Go in for the taste. Take your first sip. Don't swallow quite yet. Let it ruminate on your palate, wandering and exploring every taste bud. How does it feel in your mouth? Now breathe out (this could change the taste as mucus gets released). Detect even the smallest flavors, like salty or sweetness. How does it change as it warms in your mouth, too?
   
   • Then swallow. Then repeat. Repeat, repeat, repeat, and repeat. How is it changing with every sip? Does it change as you reach the bottom of your glass?
5. Drink up! Don't leave it to get warm and stale. If you drank from a bottle (why would you do that?) and you recap it for later, it'll get skunky when you come back to it, so don't bother. Beer is best now.
   
   • Okay, so you can let it get a little warm. Really, really cold beer has its flavors masked by temperature. Let it warm up a bit and you may notice nice changes. But there's a line where it crosses and becomes not so tasty – if you wait, you'll find that line.

[Edit]Tips

• Carbonation is what tears up your insides after a good night of drinking (namely, gas). By pouring straight into the glass, you release the carbonation along with the aroma of the beer.
• You can tell if a glass is clean after you pour a beer into it while tilting the glass slightly. If the head sticks to the sides of the glass, it is clean. An unclean glass will make your beer go flat quickly, usually within a minute. You are perfectly within your right to ask for a new glass and a new beer if this occurs.
• Always drink responsibly, and NEVER drink and drive.

[Edit]Related wikiHows

• Brew Your Own Beer
• Enjoy the Taste of Beer

[Edit]Expert Interview

Thanks for reading our article! If you'd like to learn more about drinking beer, check out our in-depth with [v162303_b01].

[Edit]References

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ [v162303_b01]. 19 January 2023.
2. ↑ http://www.primermagazine.com/2009/learn/a-guide-to-understanding-beer-and-how-to-find-new-favorites
3. ↑ https://www.ratebeer.com/feature/apr-14-2005-the-10-minute-beer-expert/457/
4. ↑ [v162303_b01]. 19 January 2023.
5. ↑ http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/101/glassware/
6. ↑ https://www.ratebeer.com/feature/apr-14-2005-the-10-minute-beer-expert/457/
7. ↑ [v162303_b01]. 19 January 2023.
8. ↑ http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/101/store/
9. ↑ [v161921_b01]. 30 August 2021.
10. ↑ http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/101/pour/
11. ↑ [v161921_b01]. 30 August 2021.

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